Everybody needs some Arash in their life!!

I think this is true. Arashi to me is just a burst  happiness and positive energy and full of love. I think everyone needs something like this, ideally of course it would be Arashi, but that's a bit impossible. I just felt like I needed to say this cause I was watching America's Supernanny and it really made me think. I was seeing these horribly out of control kids and parents. It made me think of my family.

I think my family has some of these faults (like all families) to a certain degree, definitely not to the point of these kids. Both my parents work extremely hard and when I was growing up and even now I rarely saw them during the week because they were often gone by the time I got up and would come home late at night. I knew they did it to support our family. So me and my siblings were raised by my grandparents on my father's side. They lived with us and did and still do so many things for us. Like cooking and cleaning and all those things that parents do for us.

Most kids feel neglected and are very upset when they don't see their parents like this. But for me, I dunno if this is weird or a bit messed up, but I didn't particularly mind maybe because I was used to it. But I enjoyed my freedom (in a sense), so maybe that is why I don't really like family time that much. Maybe it's because my parents do nag me like any other parents and I felt like whenever we were together I was always being nagged. I felt like my parents didn't ask me things like how was your day today or did you do anything fun today. It was just, "so how did you improve today?" Things like that (which are theoretically good), but most days I don't do anything that I consider a large improvement, but my parents want me to strive for that, and I know that's a good thing, but I found it very stressful that i would have to come up with something of some sort as not to disappoint them.

My brother and sister and my twin can all be very rowdy. I see myself as the substitute parent when my grandparents and parents aren't around. I do the cooking (to the best of my abilities), the cleaning up, the chores, and ordering the other kids to do chores. I feel like this should be my older sister (twin)'s job to set by example, but often times she is the worst of them all.

In Supernanny, technology is shown to be a big factor of why the family is so splintered. I agree. But I'm a hypocrite, I feel like I can't live without my computer and we are all often separated on our electronics. And not out and about. I don't know if I can change that part of me though. I will try to. The problem with me is that unlike others, I often understand my problems and faults, but I have no motivation to actually change them.

This post is getting quite long so I'm going to continue on the next post.